I don’t usually pay attention to articles or blog posts that start out with, “You might be a _____ if you _____,” but I looked this one over and found myself in several of the “you might be’s.” Here are a few of my favorites:
You might be a Calvinist if:
If a free Bible has ever arrived in the mail to you from John MacArthur
If you have ever purchased 100 or more copies of the same John Piper book to hand out to random people you meet
If you have adjusted the default passage setting at www.biblegateway.org from “NIV” to “ESV”
If you have ever purposefully sung a different word in a hymn to conform to scripture
Without me giving last names, you still know who I’m referring to (I got most of these right):
John
John
John
John
John
Jonathan
John
John
John
You know what a Remonstrant is.
SPREAD 
I think I may be a Calvinist…
But,
This one made me sad (for folks who don’t):
If you actually see all the members of your church every week, you might be a Calvinist.
And this one made me cringe:
You think they went too easy on Servetus.
Thanks for posting!
Some of those sound awfully elitist. E.g., what does knowing/loving Obadiah or wearing out your Bible have to do with being a Calvinist? Sounds to me like that list is saying that Calvinists are the only believers who really love God, which is pretty offensive.
Andrew,
Not all of them are true. Neither are 99% of the Blond jokes people tend to share, but we tell them anyway. I posted this because many of them are funny.
I do believe Calvinists have a better grasp of the God of the Bible, and from that can flow a greater gratitude toward God and Jesus’ work on the cross than a man-centered theology would have.
Which Andrew do I have the privilege of interacting with?
Brother-in-law to your self-proclaimed best friend (http://joyfilledbloggers.blogspot.com/2009/01/on-friends-and-calvin.html).
I’m probably just taking it too seriously, but it seems dangerous to me to perpetuate (even humorously) a “my theology vs. man-centered theology” view, but I’ll leave it at that.
I appreciate your input, Andrew. Feel free to interact anytime.